Love God (check). Love People (....).

I realize that title maybe makes me sound like a not so nice person. Surprise, surprise, I'm not a perfect person (Hoobastank anyone? ha). This is something I've been thinking about a lot here lately. As a Christian it is very easy to say, "Yes, I love God." It may even be "easy" to live out that love. And sure it's easy to SAY "Yes, I love people," but actions speak louder than words... Think of the people you love. Most will include family and friends. Maybe you would even say you love people in general. I tend to feel that way. I definitely love my family and friends, and I don't generally harbor ill feelings towards humanity as a whole. Before I say anything else about various types of people and difficulty with loving them, a refresher on what love is. (side note: if you ever read my posts on myspace, which I no longer have, some of this may sound familiar. I apologize for the redundancy, but it's clearly something important, and things haven't changed.) Anywho. The Bible is full of talk of love, what it means, how to demonstrate it and all that. 1 Corinthians 13 is well known as the "love chapter", and lays it out pretty clear:

"Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek out its own, is not provoked, does not take into account of wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails..." (vs. 4-8a)

John 13:34-35 says, "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."

So, I wouldn't normally say that there is anyone I don't love. I might say I don't necessarily like that person, but I do love them. As I've examined this mindset some, and thought about what the Bible says, I've realized I'm fooling myself. There are people I know that have hurt me in some way or another, there are people I know that are difficult to get along with, there are people I know that frustrate me and drive me crazy (sometimes just by mention of their name), there are people who have taken advantage of me... Some of those people I no longer have any sort of interaction with, but I can tell you that what I feel deep down when they are brought up in conversation doesn't fit the definition of love from 1 Corinthians. And the way I react to the people from those categories that I do interact with doesn't fit that definition either. I try to not be outright rude or hateful to anyone, but absence of hate does not equal presence of love. I don't see "love puts up with people" or "love refrains from sharing what you're really wanting to say" up there anywhere. The human response to being wronged, or mistreated, or even just frustrated is not to love the person. Many kids I have worked with will respond with, "Well, he/she did it to me first," when I catch them doing something they shouldn't. I cannot tell you how many times I have said, "Just because someone did something to you doesn't mean you can do it back." I'm realizing that I need to listen to myself. Someone treating me in a way that makes me feel unloved does not give me the right to treat them the same way. Something else I've noticed isn't included in 1 Corinthians 13 is any sort of timeline. It does not say, "Love is patient the first 12 times, after that all bets are off." There is never any justification for treating any person without love, no matter what they have done to me or how many times. I'm going to get a little more personal. There is one person I have been having this issue with for over a year now. I realized early on that I was not reacting to said person in a very Christlike manner. Like I said early, I was not outright rude, but I also wasn't trying to be nice or show love. Every time I would decide to start again, and really try to approach this person with the right attitude, they would do something else to make it hard to do that. There is a quote from Evan Almighty (I don't know your feelings on the movie, but this is a good quote, promise) that I really like, and have been reminded of a couple times lately: "If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does He give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does He give him courage or opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does He give them opportunities to love each other?" I have been praying for a change in attitude towards this person, and everytime I'd think I finally have it, I'd have some sort of interaction with them and discover I still felt the same way. I shared this quote before, but, "You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it." My feelings aren't going to "magically" be changed..I have to live like I've changed. This requires completely adjusting how I think and handle things, but it can be done. I have to see this person as God sees them, and not as someone that can drive me absolutely crazy. And it needs to be that way with ALL people, the ones who have hurt me, used me, made me mad, whatever... Because there is something else the Bible says about love: "If someone says, "I love God," and hates his brother, he is a liar; for the one who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has seen." (1 John 4:20). If I'm not living a life of love to ALL people, regardless of who they are or what they have done, I can't truly say I love God.